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Friday, May 11, 2012

Picardigans

Jean-Luc Picard from Star Trek: The Next Generation may be the most iconic character of all-time. Patrick Stewart plays the passive, thoughtful philosopher captain nearly perfectly. Because of his well-established personality, he makes a great target for hilarious picture-posts and the like. I post on certain forums quite a lot, so throughout the years I've horded quite a few "Picardigans", the name that I lovingly give these Picard-themed picture posts. I'm posting them here for others to use as well as a permanent image host for myself to use. Hope some of you get laughs from this.

Sorry, but most of these I found while browsing the web so I don't know who the original owners are. If you are a creator of one of these pictures and wish to be credited, please contact me via email.

1. The Facepalm


One of Picard's most iconic poses... putting his head in his hands, revealing his bald head. When Picard does this, you know you seriously f-ed up. Use this one when someone says something so ridiculous that words are not enough to describe the fail.

Sometimes, one facepalm just isn't enough depending on the situation. Thank God we have the Double Facepalm for those types of situations.

2. Enough of this Shit



As you can see, I included two because they are essentially the same. When you're simply done trying to discuss something with someone so completely ignorant that they fail to recognize their own farts, give them this then leave.



This one kind of falls under this theme, and is just too awesome not to include. Anyone who has watched The Next Generation knows Wesley Crusher, like many internet trolls, is one of the most annoying people in the world.

3. Full of Win!


 While rare, there are occasional occurrences of joy on internet forums. For those times, we have Picard's "Full of Win!" face.

4. Do Not Want!

 
When something bad happens that you just don't want... At least Picard has already expressed that feeling for you in a way that just about everyone would understand.

6. WTF is this Shit?

Occasionally, something will happen that you just don't know how to respond to. Not because a person is defeating you with logic, or facts, or anything like that. More like the person is so completely incoherent that they fail to make their position or arguments known in any logical way. For those times, Picard gives us this.

7. I just Shat myself with Surprise
The idea of Captain Picard actually "shitting" himself is absurd and yet, priceless. Obviously, this one is meant to be a sarcastic one... when something happens that is meant to be surprising, but truly isn't. 

8. Bitch please...
Sometimes, even respectable forum members can be extremely bitchy. Picard has an excellent face for this to show someone just how much of a diva they are being.

9. I'm the god damned Captain!

Being the Captain does allow you to order people around, no matter what the request. It also means that you are always right, even when you're wrong. Some Forum Moderator or Owner may like this one in attempt to control the masses.

Now, it should be known that I'm not a fan of cake. I truly believe that the cake is a lie. However, it fits the theme.

10. Don't phase me, bro!
Similar to the already established "Don't taze me, bro!" meme, this one can be used to defend yourself from a flame attack.

11. What would Picard do?
Seriously, the man is a modern (okay, post-modern) Saint. Just asking yourself one simple question: "What would Picard do?" would prevent you from making a complete ass of yourself 99% of the time.

12. Picard's flip-off
Nothing is worse than when Jean-Luc Picard flips you off, and then add that you deserve it. Ouch... you must've really screwed up.

13. My heart! If I had one, it would be breaking!

Okay, okay... It's not Picard, but Q is a great character, too. And his sarcastic style makes him perfect for this, so I decided to include it anyway. This could probably used instead of the "Bitch please..." Picardigan.

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